To Be a Girl by Bungling Housewife


What does it really mean to be a girl? Does our society demand too much of them? Or too little (yeah right)? Is there really such a thing as being too ‘girly’ or not being girly enough?

Being a girl these days isn’t too easy. Everyone seems to have their own pet ideas about what makes a girl or what a girl should or should not do. Right from the time a girl is born, she’s seen as an object, a ‘doll’ to be dressed up, to be made ‘pretty’. As she grows older, this idea is reinforced again and again and again: a girls job is to look ‘nice’, to stay well groomed, to wear nice clothes and above all else, to always match her purse to her shoes. As she grows older, this list of what a girl needs to be is added to, little by little. A girl needs to learn how to cook, she needs to be neat and be capable of multitasking. A girl should always have time for her appearance, no matter how busy she is. A girl should always be careful not to darken her complexion or put on any excess weight. A girl should be capable to keeping her house neat as a pin without any help. A girl needs to always guard her ‘reputation’ and her modesty. Nice girls don’t hang out with friends too often, they stay home with the family. If, God forbid, anything bad does happen, it is somehow always the girl’s fault for just not being careful enough.

It is the girl who needs to compromise in her relationships, to always put others happiness above her own. It is a girl’s job to keep her husband happy and her children clean, fed and well-behaved. A successful girl will marry, keep house, cook, clean, raise her children, manage the household, and all while balanced precariously on pretty heels beneath a pretty dress. Boys will be boys, their sins (no matter how big or small) forgivable by those that love them and by society at large but girls can never have that option. A girl must always be perfect because any mistake she may make will haunt her for the rest of her life. A boy will get multiple second chances but a girl, she will get only the one chance and so she better make the best of it.

Society expects a lot from girls, but it’s not the high expectations that break a girl, it’s the lack of appreciation it implies. All this is your duty ladies, so of course you have no choice in the matter so why should we appreciate you? What do you want, a medal?

Yes. A medal would be nice. But short of that, at least a good word here and there won’t kill you. Girls are the mothers of all nations and all families and they are stronger than any boy can ever hope to be. It won’t kill you to appreciate them from time to time.


Bungling Housewife: I’m an Anthropologist by training, a housewife by choice, a voracious reader, a lover of fantasy fiction and Sci-Fi, a new mommy, an observer of human nature, a closet optimist and a cupcake enthusiast. I write about all of the above and anything that might strike my fancy :)